Stimming and sibbing

Stimming is a self-soothing behaviour employed by some people to take their minds off all the other extra stimulation coming in that might otherwise overwhelm them.  Some of these behaviours are obvious to other people – the “classic” hand-flapping, rocking, humming, nodding and other outwardly visible behaviours.  Others are invisible or at such a low level that they are considered by outsiders to be “ordinary” habits or quirks – nail biting / cleaning, hair fiddling, chewing the insides of the cheek.

It might seem ironic to use a particular stimulus to counter other stimuli, but for some it works if it is distracting enough, and the person can focus on just that one stimulus.  For some, the stimulus doesn’t have to be the sole focus of attention, it just needs to take care of the senses that would basically get bored and clamour for attention when conscious attention is required elsewhere.

Sibbing is a subset of stimming.  SIB stands for Self-Injurious Behaviours – things like biting oneself, or banging one’s head on a wall.

Stimming and sibbing are not confined to autistic people, or others with neurological differences.  Therefore, while it may alert you to the fact that someone is autistic, it is not an absolute diagnostic criterion.

A lot of the time, the autist may not even realise that they stim, because they have been doing it for so long and it requires no conscious thought.  It may take the stories of another autistic person, or for someone to ask them why they are doing something, for them to even realise that they do it, or used to do it (stims employed can change with age).

The Temple Grandin quote below reminded me of something I used to do in childhood.  For a time when I was a child, we had ducks and chickens, and grains were part of their diet.  The grain came in large drums that were big enough to allow me to put my head into the grain quite deeply – I loved the feel, the tickle, of the grain through my hair, on my scalp, and around my ears.  At other times I just used to let the grain dribble through my fingers as I examined all the different types – wheat, barley, sorghum, buckwheat, and more - that came in the mix.

As an adult, I have been surprised on occasion by Other Half asking, “What are you thinking?”  When I have responded with, “How do you know I’m thinking?” he has pointed out that I’ve been drumming my fingers, or tapping my feet while pointing them towards the person I’m speaking to.  These are things that I have been completely unaware I am doing, but he as someone who knows and loves me well, has realised it means certain things are going on inside of me.

Sometimes, I employ habits that I am well aware at the time that I am doing, even if the activity itself runs mostly on ‘autopilot’, like fiddling with my hair – curling and twirling it around my fingers – something I picked up from one of my sisters.  And at times these activities appear to require more of my conscious input – doing the dishes and putting them away is an example - but leave the major part of my conscious processes for more important matters like holding deep and meaningful conversations with Other Half or a friend.

These are examples where my eyes or fingers, or both, would clamour for attention just when I need to direct my attention to some other specific task.  So next time you see me sewing when at church, or at a conference, don’t assume I’m not paying attention.  This just may be my way of appeasing some of my senses so that others can do their job more effectively.

“When I did stims such as dribbling sand through my fingers, it calmed me down. When I stimmed, sounds that hurt my ears stopped. Most kids with autism do these repetitive behaviors because it feels good in some way. It may counteract an overwhelming sensory environment . . .”  – Temple Grandin